Lately, I’ve been thinking if it would be easier to my readers if I just wrote in Portuguese. Everyone commenting here are Brazilians and I keep thinking if it is silly to keep writing in English :)

But I also have a suspicious some of you readers, follow the blog but just don’t comment… So with you in mind, I’m running this poll.

Always remember you can use the translator feature on the right-hand side of the blog, to translate either English-> Portuguese or Portuguese->English.

Please cast your vote (even if you don’t want to leave a comment) so I know if you are reading in English, or prefer English, I will leave it that way.

Ultimamente tenho pensado se seria mais fácil pro meus leitores se eu escrevesse em Português. Todo mundo que comenta aqui é Brasileiro, então eu fico achando meio bobo ficar escrevendo em inglês.

Mas eu também desconfio que algumas pessoas de fora lêem o blog sem comentar e algumas pessoas Brasileiras também preferem em inglês (para praticar o inglês), então pensando nisso, tô fazendo essa pesquisa…

Lembre-se que vocês podem sempre usar o tradutor do lado direito do blog pra traduzir Inglês -> Português ou vice-versa.

Por favor vote (mesmo que você não queira deixar um comentário) e eu vou saber o que vocês preferem :)

Which language would you prefer I blog on? Que língua você prefere que eu blogue?

View Results

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If you want explain more your vote, use the comments bellow :) Otherwise, thank you!

Se quiserem explicar mais o voto, podem usar os comentários aí embaixo, senão obrigada!!

This week has been busy with work, but good productive and with amazing feedbacks from the boss, just the way you like it! Been hectic at home, they are changing the flat windows, so it has been noisy and annoying! I don’t like strangers as it is, and to have them peeping doesn’t help one little bit. But hey ho, soon all will be over so no worry putting up with it a little bit!

I’ve been also busy playing with floorplans, 3D models, Interior Designs Magazines, replying e-mails, and reading blogs (have finally emptied my to read list off my reader \:D/  yeay). I tried to change my trend of commenting every post, but sometimes was hard not to, and I did anyway (mostly with blogs which the author: is close to me and/or comments here frequently and/or has expressed likes comments before and/or is a close real friend). I am trying to find a midway between what I always thought was the right way to go about it and the way that makes me less paranoid about it all. I think I am getting there, finally :> Don’t want to turn this into a “storm inside a glass of water” :)) (That’s another Brazilian saying for ya!)

Also changed my habits on facebook and twitter and I think is helping me a lot on this road to self-balance. More to come on this subject.

Went training twice, struggled a LOT to breathe, but still managed reasonable distances. Going later today as well, once the strange people go way.

Updated my wants-to list :)>-  When you look it like that, not bad at all for a 6 weeks period!

* So the games are almost over. It has been a suprise World Cup, I will tell you that! Lots of favourites were out sadly, but what counts is the 90  minutes performance in the end, and that’s one of the ugliest beauties of the game. I was disappointed by Netherlands getting through, they cheated kicking players all the time and pressuring the referees. Happy for Spain, even without Torres having a brilliant campaign, they played fair, and Villa has been superb!

* I am supporting Uruguay tonight because they are South America, but I like Joachim Loew, so I won’t be sad if they win :) I will probably decide once the game starts and I will check who is playing fairer and  going more for the goal.

Headmaster: You’ll be lucky to find a job on the docks because you’re going nowhere. Here at Quarry Bank generally… nowhere.
John: Is “nowhere” full of geniuses, sir? Because then I probably do belong there.

Ok, so I was expecting this movie to be great! I was expecting to tell us all about the dirt between Paul and John (McCarthy and Lennon that is, keep up! :-D ). Maybe that’s what spoiled it for me, unfortunately. If you are willing to see this movie, don’t do the same mistake I did. About the Beatles, it ain’t. It is all about John. But not John’s family, or John’s friends, or music, or school. Actually is not even about John, per se,but it  is about his head. They don’t go deep, and don’t get close to very much. All is very superficial, the going of the movie is very slow, and feel very artsy. I don’t mind slow and artsy, (e.g. I loved Control – about Joy Division’s singer) as long it is leading somewhere, but unfortunately (sorry for the pun) this one just lead nowhere, it is all very lose, confusing and well, pointless. Maybe the story is just not strong enough, or special enough, or powerful enough to be told. Nonetheless, a great thing about the movie though is the acting by Aaron Johnson playing John and Kristin Scott Thomas playing Auntie Mimi. It is something worthy keeping watching the movie for. Just.

Busy bee again :bz but no news there :) Flu/hayfever finally gone and I am back to my good self, finally!

Went to see Mrs. G and her Baby G., how cute can an oriental baby be? The cutest!!! =D We caught up with life, and I had a wonderful time in the Sun. Then went to meet Mr. and Mrs. M for a spot of Caetano Veloso @ Barbican Hall, he did some crazy weirdo stuff but still totally worth it! Could not believe when he did my favourite Trem das Cores \:D/

Stroppy but his wonderful voice is all he needs

So going back to training tonight, looking forward to it! Have put on a weight I really didn’t want to, but hey ho, no point complaining about, hate something, change something, make something better, that’s my motto!

Speaking of hating something, changing something, a lot of things I hated happened lately, involving the past, friends and things I’d like have gone differently.

But again, all I will do is something to change it, and try and make it better, for me. It is not only the fact I hate confrontation, is also the fact I believe every time I complain to people the way I feel, it is in a way empowering that person to make me feel that way. And I don’t like that feeling one little bit. Also, there is the feeling of being silly, complaining about something that is not there, and is only my self-esteem (or lack of it) and paranoia getting the best of me.

So the change will have to come from me, and mostly the problem is with me anyway, (maybe a middle-child-syndrome symptom)  getting jealous of people not giving me attention as they do to each other. I need to accept that’s what happens when friends are not “mine”, but have been copied. I have to learn and cope with that, and readjust that despite I consider them my FRIENDS, they may consider me their friend. And I can live with that no problem, just need to know where I stand really. I will do my usual re-shuffle, I only hope this going with the flow, when I take a step back, doesn’t get me in trouble again, as it did before, but if it does, this time I am completely sure I did my best, and maybe it just wasn’t enough, and time for the friendship to move on to another place or finish completely.

On the other side, a lot of things I loved happened as well, balance of the Universe kinda of thing. Reconnected with my real, “original” friends, the cave planning is taking new and exciting highs, my work contract is in the process of being renewed and as I said on the top of the post, my ilness has gone away. I am happy, and content and have to stop “looking for hairs on egg shells” like we say in Brazil :-D

*So, Brazil is out of the World Cup. I always knew they wouldn’t make it to the final. They’ve played a passionless football, with too much diving, complaining and getting annoyed with the opponent when they played a certain level above the average. Yes, I do agree the referee was weak, but when you are considered the geniuses of football, no referee should be able to stop you unless it is scandalous incompetence, which wasn’t on the case by far.

* I was rooting for Uruguay to get through. Ghana team is a brute team, shouting and intimidating adversaries is not how football should be won. I think was a fair result and I am happy for Uruguay, which has been playing good solid football throughout.

* Argentina not going through and loosing 4×0 was a shock. I was getting to like their passion and the clean football they played throughout the tournament. They didn’t cheat, didn’t dive, didn’t become violent, and you gotta leave the rivalry aside to admit and admire that . Unfortunately,(and it hurts me to say that) Brazil was the one doing all those things this year, and you gotta leave your Brazilian heart aside to admit that as well. With me, love for the sport speaks louder than the love or hate for the teams.

* Did not see the Spain game, but happy Torres will get another chance to try ;)

Tom: What happens when you fall in love? Summer: You believe in that? Tom: It's love, it's not Santa Claus.

Between one game and the other, and the cave planning, we managed to, finally , watch 500 days of Summer. The movie starts saying it is not a love story, and I disagree with it. For me, it is a love story, and all love entitles, including coming to an end, or not being corresponded. It is an amazing story, got me gripped on the sofa and shut myself up (I usually speak a LOT during movies) and I just wanted to know if the predictable, sweeter-than-honey, messes-up-with-peoples-heads-and-expectations-about-how-real-life-should-be annoying Hollywoodian ending would come. Well, I am not going to spoil that for you ;)  But enjoyed it a lot!

On the trendy subjects going around lately…

*World Cup* :-bd  But then again, I’m this huge fan of the sport, someone who gets all the feelings it has to offer. Spoke about my love football before, but there is something about the World Cup, a pinnacle of the sport, the passion. For me, is all about the underdogs, the ones we can never expect to get any results, but there is always at least one to prove us wrong. To prove highly paid salaries is nothing compared to a heart beating fast in their chest and wearing the country’s shirt means carrying that nation. And watch this space, unless the world cup is really bland and boring, I will put my thoughts in here in how its all gone and why it is so magical to me!

*Sex and the City 2* :-bd Forget about the shoes, the clothes, the frivolity of them never EVER discussing world affairs and what is going on in this planet (mind you I don’t like discussing these things either, look General News bellow). What I like about these girls, is their friendship, the fact life is not easy for them either, and they go through the tough times together. They fight, they make up, they get disappointed (with others and each other) and they survive. For all the bits that I personally think as being wrong “woman role model”  it makes up for that. So yeah, I am one of those going to see the second film, after the first one being very moving and worth the 2-4-1 tickets!

*General News* :-q I have been absent from rants about the Israeli Attack on the Hamaz aid boat, the BT Oil Leak, and general bad news, because I absolutely hate propagating bad news. If you have bad news and have something that I can do to help to fix, assist or change it, fair enough. But I think propagating bad news with no purpose, is only a way to increase the bad feelings already taking over us. At least the way I see it, the frustration, anger, hopelessness generated by the news only generate more actions towards more of these being created. I really do not get how Twitter, Facebook or blog rantings really put a pressure on change. Unless they bring something we can pay for (singles for Xmas chart, help with Haiti Aid) sign for (Number 10 petitions, Kidnapped kids cause) I really don’t know how rantings can help. Most of the time, for me, it only shows how people can be rude when in the net, disregarding other people’s – sometimes your closest friends – opinions, and again, generating more anger and frustration – and here I prove my point. I ignore the rude rants from friends and will never hold it against them (I know they are not like that in person) is just that I am not prepared to do it. And where do I get the news from? Good News with Russell Howard, Mock the Week and Have I got news from you. All comedy shows about the news, which is great to get to know what is happening without getting depressed. Of course, my timeline also tells me about the disasters of the world, along with their personal views, sometimes I even few there is a race to tell everyone what tragic happened that day 8-| So don’t expect me ever to propagate bad news (murders, terrorist attacks, nature’s disasters, political scandals and the lot) unless I can do and tell you to do something about it.

*TV Series* :-bd As  lately I’ve been refusing to watch the news, I have to fill the TV time with something else. We are very much into Great British Menu, 24 (the final will be aired next weekend), House, Bones, Four Weddings, Come Dine with me and Red Dwarf (on DVD) have been brilliant taking me to Zombieland and forgetting all the doom and gloom outside :-D

*Meeting friends* :-?  Happy with the way I’ve taking the initiative to arrange meet ups with the friends lately. Sad with them not able to make it most of the time. But my motto now is to do my part, what to come, be more than welcome, don’t want/ cannot join us? See ya next time then, I’m going!  =) Maybe this is why I can’t remember last weekend I just stayed put and not done anything :> Not complaining though, never!

In the middle of the big snowfall in UK in the last 30 years, I write this post, hence the pictures…

DSC00435So we’ve finished a decade and started a new one, but yes, I do feel like it was only about 2 years ago I was working during the millennium New Year’s eve (making sure the bug didn’t bite anyone). So much happened in my life since then. Roller-coaster on it’s best form. If I had gone to a fortune teller 10 years ago and she told me everything that happened in my life on the last 10 years I would’ve never ever believed her and think she was having a laugh. Looking back, I see my life was anything but blunt. Despite of what I may have thought at the time…

SAM_0263But last year I was on the process of finishing a chapter in my life to start another.  Saying goodbye to some characters who will not be as present as they were. Getting to know or reconnect with other who have faded away. Meeting new ones, who would make my life exciting, and show me life do go on. So much more ups and downs are still to come in my life, all I need to know now is that. Life do go on, no matter what. There will always be one day when everything will be bright again. And even when that doesn’t happen, the hope for the light will be enough. Life goes on until the end, which is certain, and that’s the beauty of it. And after the chapter was finished, I’ve learnt there is no point – at least for me – to plan. Or to expect things will go your way. And who is to say your way is the best way?

SAM_0274So (from a few years ago and is an ongoing process , is not even a New Year’s resolution per se) my decision is to go with the flow. Is more about the way I do things, than what I want done. Is about how, more than what. Not take things so personally / be less paranoic / give less of me for people who don’t deserve so much / believe and accept people like me / stop thinking the world is against me / stand more for what I think I am doing right / be less resistant to change what I believe is wrong with me / look after myself – pretty inside and outside / Call my friends more / Keep the busy calendar going / do more of what I love in life * Photos * Books * Movies * Writing * Dancing * Singing * Laughing * Cooking * Webdesign * so-much-more-the-list-would-get-too-big-and-boring-to-continue…

This way, I’ve learnt since there are no resolutions in my life, there is no disappointment  when the next 31st Dec comes, about things like “This year went too fast and I didn’t get anything done”. And I will know that I’ve done my best.

SAM_0270 SAM_0272DSC00446

Yeah, for now is all I can think about. So most likely my posts will be about it. Living and staying in U.K. And I want to stay so much, they won’t let me go. At all. Even temporarily, for Christmas, to see my family I haven’t seen in two years. No no no, gotta stay they say, isn’t it what I want, after all? But they can’t just take a decision about just letting me stay. Stamp the darn thing, print the darn card. Then I will take my test, become British and stay.Noo, it has to take almost two years for their decision to be taken.

To be honest I only realized I wanted to stay when my life took a turn last year. I had a choice to leave everything behind, go back to homeland, but for some reason, I didn’t. I was so close to get my residence rights, it would be silly to abandon things and go. I wanted to always have the option to come back open. What if I didn’t adapt to S.P. any more? I knew life would be different from when I left 7 years ago, from post-teenagers, all my friends went adults. Work would be different (if I could find one), violence, traffic, everyone tells me things got worse. The plan was to get my paperwork done and decide my fate. But I knew I didn’t want to go without the optionof being able to come back.

Then life took another turn. And now I am sure I want to stay.

Is interesting how I never took this decision for myself before. It was always because someone told me I should stay. But on the back of my mind, I always had that question “What am I doing here?” “Why ain’t I with mum and dad while they are still alive? I am wasting their good years away, my goddaughter years away” “My friends are away, I am alone here”. I always had a doubt in my heart, if I should really be here.

But during the last year, they were close than ever, my friends here proved to be more than acquaintances, they were the ones that kept me standing. My family was on the computer anytime I wanted and needed them. My friends from the world (some in Brazil, some in the States, even one in Serbia) were closer then ever, e-mails flew back and forwards. And I was proven the distance doesn’t take anything away if you don’t let  it do it.

So yes, I do want to stay. Permantely, for more than one reason, I feel at home in London. I always felt I wasn’t the typical Brazilian. I never loved the hot weather (actually I am literally allergic to it), I will eat any food (when I am away I crave for fish and chips!), I love a clear-blue-sky-winter-midday, I like the rain, I love football, I am NOT and never been a social being. I have a few (but great) friends, I love the architecture here, the 4 seasons, the landscape, the grumpness ( I am a grumpy master myself). I love almost everything about this land because there is always their immigration services to hate.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate Brazil. I just don’t miss it. What I miss immensely is the people there. My family, my friends. And that’s all. And some food, sometimes. But nothing that can’t wait until I go there for visiting.

Last time I went to Brazil I was disappointed on how rude the people have become, I was hurt by some people on the supermarket queue looking at my mum as if she was crazy because she was initiating a chat with them without knowing them. My heart actually sunk. It made me realize the Brazil I knew is not there any more… And it made me once more remeber of my favorite movie of all times, a quote I’ve always took in my heart:

Alfredo: Living here day by day, you think it’s the center of the world. You believe nothing will ever change. Then you leave: a year, two years. When you come back, everything’s changed. The thread’s broken. What you came to find isn’t there. What was yours is gone. You have to go away for a long time… many years… before you can come back and find your people. The land where you were born. But now, no. It’s not possible. Right now you’re blinder than I am.
Salvatore: Who said that? Gary Cooper? James Stewart? Henry Fonda? Eh?
Alfredo: No, Toto. Nobody said it. This time it’s all me. Life isn’t like in the movies. Life… is much harder.”

And that kind of says anything doesn’t it?

Maybe they-who-have-the-power will make me go back. And I will. I will be happy by going back. Is where I grew up, where mum and dad raised me so happily. I won’t be sad because they would send me back, but I would be happier being able to stay, because that should be my decision and not anybody else’s. Not any more.

As it should be my decision when I decide enough is enough on what says I miss my family and want to go and see them. I hurt inside so desperately, because so many things could happen in 6 months, and it haunts me the bad things and that I wouldn’t be able to see them again. And that’s why I hurt, and cry, and start thinking if I should be here. But then Mum and Dad says I am living a better life here and they are happy for me to be here, living my life, away from everything bad that is happening over there. And it hurts and I cry again, because they are so great by being so selfless and telling me I should stay even if they are crazy to see me too, and I love them so much….

I supposed this is how a generation goes.
We notice lots of friends getting into university around the same time.
We notice lots of friends getting married around the same time.
(we notice lots of friends getting divorced around the same time)
(we notice lots of friends getting married for the second time/moving in together around the same time)
We notice lots of friends getting pregnant around the same time.
And babies popping out around the same time :)

It all started last year with 3 friends announcing they were pregnant. My big sister gave the news at the beginning of this year.
After that is like there was something in the water and it is non-stop…

My Portuguese goddaughter was born last December and she is a stunning baby. She has those delicate features and big eyes which will charm anyone, I am sure. I mostly follow her development through pictures but I will see her again at the end of the year and can’t wait for it!

Last Saturday we went to meet Mrs. A’s baby, “Banoffee Pie”. He is only teeny (8 weeks old) but he is gorgeous. He already smiles (not sure if it is reflex more than intentional), he has that baby smell, tiny hands and fingers, he was mostly quiet and cute apart from when he was hungry or annoyed.
It was great to see him after we followed the whole pregnancy.

I’ve also received the news one my dearest friends, Mrs. L had her baby-boy. I am soo happy for her and so happy everything went to plan. She is one of the nicest people I know and I wish them all the luck and health in the world.

More friends now have children (My brother gave us Gigi, my goddaughter, now 3, amazingly smart and cute and joyful), Nanda has another Giovana a cutsy too! Mrs G. is expecting a girl, Mrs. T wants a surprise. I’ve seen when Liesl got pregnant with “Peanut” and he is now a big strong boy. Another friend is preggie, but asked me to keep it quiet for now, but I am immensely happy for her too!

It makes me think if I will ever feel my clock ticking. I never did and still don’t.
It reminds me of Mr. M who has made the conscious decision not to have children…

Don’t get me wrong, I like children. I love taking care of them. I’ve always had since I was around 10 and helped my aunties with my cousins.

But I have to confess despite having a huge motherly protective feeling around everyone I know and love (Mum is my nickname after all – and I can be as annoying as one) I dread the idea of being a mother. The responsibility.

Be responsible for its well being. Kindness. Politeness. Happiness. Will it love life or hate life? The world is such a dangerous place. Life is such a hard trial. There is so much pain, so much frustration, so many people are only happy while complaining about something. The world is such a negative place I am not sure if it is fair to bring someone into it just to be another person unhappy about being alive.

The idea I will have a child, love it like I never loved anything before and than let it to go to the world scares me too.

With Mr. J, children are in the plans. Talking about them eases me more into it and warms me to the idea. And you know what? I love life. All the good and bad bits. I am glad my mom and dad decided to have me. To give me a beautiful unique name, to teach me life is good even if bad bits are in it. They taught me to be strong, to look on the bright side. To be friendly, and be friends.
They taught me life is worth it.

So I hope one day my clock will tick stronger. And I will feel more inclined in teaching what mom and dad taught me once. And maybe I can, along with my friends, raise better happier children and somehow the world will be a better place for them as well.

I do succumb to procrastination. Fact.
Is hard to get around things I have to do. Not because I am lazy or because I dislike doing them, sometimes I feel is because I know if I do them too quickly, they will be finished too fast, and then I will be left to think, and as you may have noticed it doesn’t always means something good comes out of it.
When I get thinking I usually get paranoid a bit, I over think, over analyze, over rationalize my life (and sometime other peoples life too).
So lately I have caught myself completely addicted to facebook games.
I am @ Farmville, Country Story (another farm) and Café World.
Useless as they are – there is no prize, no reward, almost no competition either – it has almost the same effect as TV has on me.
It switches me off, it stops my head from going a hundred per hour. It gets me hypnotized, and it distracts me from the things I have to do, to think about…

By blogging, I get news about other peoples lives, I can comment, offer my opinion, without having to think about my own life. I stop whatever I am doing to post. But is weird, is like once I put them down on black and white they stop following me in my head, is like they come out to never bother me again ( I will write more about this on another post).

I wonder if people realize the same. We could all be addicted to these things just escaping from our reality :\ But could be again, I am over analysing it. It could be we are all just bored. Maybe is just me exaggerating it all, something I do too (see the drama? Over thinking and exaggerating? Not good!)

I do need to cut the time I spend on the whole online surfing (twitter, blogs, facebook, facebook games, etc) but I also think if that is a blessing in disguise. Knowing myself like I do, any opportunity for my mind to start brewing something where I will end up like the villain will be taken up and that will push me down.

So my online surfing habits could all also be the cheapest therapy in the world :)

“It is neither good nor bad, but thinking makes it so.” – William Shakespeare

Something I read on Ms. C blog got me thinking…

Things one should think about improving to make one’s life better.

Pack healthy snacks to eat along the day !check! I am known for doing so and my friends are always snacking off my stock too,lol. I Hate feeling hungry because I believe this kills your muscle tissue which means more fat in your body so I avoid it at all costs! But yeah, sometimes I do forget to pack it….
After 30’s you kinda need to think a bit about these things – without being too paranoid !check! Don’t know about the not being paranoid bit, but yeah, its weird like after 30 (even if just a few months after, I may add) I naturally think more about it, like you start to know you’re not in this life forever and you need to make an effort to make most of it.
Smile and laugh more !check! I laugh at everything. And smile too. I am soo easy! And silly.
Drink a lot of water !check! I drink tons of water already. I also use the excuse to get a break and stretch my legs to get water. I was never a fan of fizzy pop and juice is only nice for me with food. I think I should thank my parents and my schools to make sure I was always into water and juice/fizzy pop were only for special occasions :)
Keep your back straight x Need to work more on this one. Posture was always a problem for me, the only time I can remember having a great posture is when I did swimming lessons. Shame here they don’t have it as the same package as the membership. But will try yoga or just being more conscious about it.
Be less online and more live action !check! I think I’ve been pretty good with this one since last year! I rarely refuse an invite to meet up and come up with ideas as well… Sometimes I try to make “online friendships” to become “real” ones, but for some reason it doesn’t seem to be working, unfortunately. So now I do my best, I offer my phone and my time. If they want to take it good, if not, what more can one do, really? I am just content I got to keep the online thingy going on as well :)
Drink less alcohol !check! I’ve been cutting my alcohol intake a lot. I never drunk a lot per se, but during the last year I was having at least a glass on Fridays, but it turned into two and then you don’t want to leave half a bottle there… So I stopped it. I have it small bottles (they sell tiny ones here which comes with 2 glasses worth of wine) when I feel like it, or will drink some when with friends and not driving…
Pay attention to things around you !check! Hehehe, that’s something I am always doing as well. I guess as I am working from home now is a bit more difficult but even driving around, or just watching TV or surfing the net I am always trying to catch new things in the air and notice people, things around me. They intrigue me, I always catch myself thinking about their past, what brought them there.
Take more photos. Write more. Life is too busy to expect our poor
little brain to remember everything.
Could not agree more. I am always a great fan of pictures and videos and anything that helps our poor memory/attention spam.
Sing !check! I am always singing, humming. So yeah, check that too.

Adding a few of my own:
* Forgive – Life is too short for begrudges.
* Give up – Nothing wrong with failure, it’s only a sign you’ve tried. If you know you’ve tried your best, don’t waste more energy than is needed and move on. Life will sort things out.
* Dance – is there a better way to just let your body go as it wishes? (Ok there is, but preferably in public dancing is still a better choice of not getting arrested.)
* Make jokes – You never know when people will find it funny (or that is so bad is good ) and is a great feeling to make someone laugh or just smile :)
* Compliment people – Forget about weakness, let’s try some strong point for a change and it is bound to go back to you, even when you don’t want to.
* Pay attention to the sky. It gets you thinking beautiful things, even when is gray and dark. You know one day the clouds will go and all will be fine again. Inevitably.
* Say what you think – but without being rude, just strong. Life is short to live one that is not your own.
* Mean what you say. Always.
* Look on the bright side of life. Pollyana style all the way for me.

A conversation last week made a light go in my head on how is important or indeed possible for us to learn from our mistakes.
Hearing someone actually telling me how they would never learn from their mistakes was a bit of a shock, but provoked a sea wave in my mind.
Maybe is just me, but I believe learning from our mistakes is the path to avoid things we know made us unhappy, angry, frustrated, ill, everything that made us suffer in the past. And this way, we would then make sure to act towards a better, happier, brighter present, and consequently future, too. And how consciously decide to ignore mistakes you’ve made before? Or is it done unconsciously?
I could be wrong and no matter how hard we try we will always make mistakes, the same ones over and over again because that’s what we are, and that how we live, but I’d like to think we are better than that, and more intelligent, if so only to fool ourselves thinking we are doing our best to grow up, to change, to adjust, to learn.
So yeah, I will do my best to remain alert.
Keep trying not commit the same errors without loosing who I am.
Be less paranoid, not letting myself go, not take things so personally, be less jealous, express my opinions and desires more out-loud but without being in-your-face.
Just a few of a big list I have, but hard things to do. “Old habits die hard” but I hope they die, sooner or later :)

“Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way. Unless it’s a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from.” – Al Franken

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